What is the Retrouvaille Program?

Marriage Rediscovery presents an updated version of the Retrouvaille program. See how it's different. The weekend started in Quebec in 1977 and has helped tens of thousands of couples since. Here's what it is, who it's for, and what happens at one.

If you typed the program name into a search bar tonight and want a straight answer before clicking around, this is the page for that.

What it is

The Retrouvaille program is a three-day weekend retreat followed by six 90-minute post-weekend sessions, usually one a week for six weeks. After that, couples can stay connected through optional monthly community meetings called CORE.

The weekend runs Friday evening to Sunday afternoon at a hotel or retreat center. Couples sleep on site. Meals are included. The work happens between the two of you, in private. There is no group therapy and no sharing in front of strangers.

The post-weekend sessions extend the weekend into your normal life. The same dialogue technique you learn on Friday gets applied to harder material over the following weeks, with a small group of other couples and a presenting team in the room. The skills are intentional. See what you'll learn on the weekend for a full breakdown of the communication method.

Who it's for

Most couples come to us in serious trouble. Distance has become the default. One of you has had an affair, or both of you have. You sleep in different rooms, or in the same bed without touching. Separation papers may already be in motion. The program was built for couples in exactly that spot. That's where most of our weekends land.

A smaller share of couples come earlier. The marriage feels off but isn't broken. Conversations got tired. There is less laughter. Friction shows up over things that didn't used to matter. Nothing is on fire and you both know it, but you also know the trajectory. The weekend works on this end of the scale too. The skills are easier to use when there is less to repair. If you're not sure whether this describes you, the is Retrouvaille for us page walks through the most common situations.

What happens at a weekend

You arrive Friday evening. A team of three couples and a clergy member presents short talks across the weekend, drawn from their own marriages. After each talk you go to your room and write privately to your spouse, using a simple structured format the team teaches you. Then you read what your spouse wrote and the two of you talk about it, in private. That is the rhythm: talk, write, dialogue. Repeat.

There are no breakout circles. No one asks you to share what is happening in your marriage with the room. You don't role-play. You don't take a personality test. The team uses their own stories so you can use yours.

Saturday is the longest day. Sunday wraps mid-afternoon. By the time you go home you have a working communication tool and a clearer sense of what got you to the weekend in the first place. The full schedule and what to bring are on our weekend retreat page. For an hour-by-hour walk through the program format, see what happens on a Retrouvaille weekend.

This is not therapy. The presenters are not counselors. They are couples who have done the program themselves and stayed to help the next ones through. We transform marriages by teaching couples how to do the work themselves, by example. No counselor. No therapy. Just you and your spouse, with help from couples who have done it. If you are curious how Retrouvaille is different from counseling or other retreat options, that page covers the comparison directly.

What it costs

There is no fixed price. Couples give what they can. The donation covers the venue, meals, and materials. We never turn anyone away for inability to pay, and the volunteers who run the weekends, including the presenting couples, receive no payment. The whole program is funded by the couples it has already helped. More on the cost page.

Does it work

Retrouvaille International ran a 5-year follow-up survey of 5,236 couples who attended the program. Two numbers came out of it.

76% of couples who complete the program are still married five years later. 95% of attendees would recommend the program to a struggling couple. The full survey context, including why those two numbers measure different things, is covered in what the data shows, including how the data was gathered and what it actually measures.

The benefits

The program teaches a single skill, written dialogue, and builds on it across the weekend and six follow-up sessions. Couples leave with something they can use the same week. The program benefits page lists the specific outcomes couples report, from rebuilding trust after an affair to recovering from years of emotional distance.

How it fits together

Retrouvaille is a structured sequence, not a standalone event. The weekend opens a door; the follow-up sessions are where the change becomes durable. The program structure explains how the weekend, the six post-weekend sessions, and the optional CORE community connect into a single arc.

The Catholic Church's teaching on marriage, developed most fully in the USCCB pastoral letter Marriage: Love and Life in the Divine Plan, frames marriage as a permanent covenant capable of renewal. Retrouvaille grew from that conviction and operates inside that tradition.

How it differs from counseling

Counseling is usually weekly, one-on-one or as a couple with a therapist. The therapist is a paid professional with clinical training, and the work runs on a schedule the therapist sets. Retrouvaille is a three-day intensive plus six weekly follow-up sessions, peer-led by couples who have done the program themselves. Many of the couples who come to us have already tried counseling, sometimes for years. The longer comparison is on our counseling page.

Find a weekend on our program page. If you would rather talk to someone before you sign up for anything, contact us and a volunteer couple will call you back.